/s4s/ - anime pillow fight

nobody needs a brain anyway i figured out you can turn it off if you just put a hole in your head and wait until the blood leaks out. theres nothing quite like going dizzy and knowing youre never going to wake up ever again it must feel incredible

>>65890 (OP) 
Who is everyone

>>65892
i dont mean everyone just the few people that i end up annoying when i talk to them

i mean like, everyone i talk to, but its not a lot of people

>>65894
If it's on this site then it might not even be related to you but just someone having a bad day/life and unloading

>>65896
no i know, but those words dont really mean anything to me, im sorry

>>65896
if you think im retarded then please just say it because it really hurts not knowing

>>65898
I feel like I'd need to get into a lot of nuance/contexr here with you on what exactly annoyed you, fully grasp the situation and all, but honestly if I were you I'd stop wasting time getting caught up in these feelings and distract myself with something, do something that brings you joy or form a new, more pleasant connection with someone irl or online than waste all this mental bandwidth recycling negative emotions stemming from likely a few brief rude chats you had with complete strangers online which beyond this site you won't meet or see in your life ever

>>65899
I'm typing this a bit sleep deprived but I think you get me

>>65901
okay im sleepy too

>>65899
its not really related to anyone from this site i feel like this all the time i just ignore it usually. i think your advice is really good though so thank you for speaking to me i never hear people say such positive things

>>65902
Glad to be of help, you reminded me of me somewhat when I used to care about others opinion of me more so I thought describing my current state of mind and thought process could be of use
I still do care somewhat, but now I just compartmentalize stress, dissociate, distract myself and in general care less about people's opinions and care more about myself more, prioritize myself more. Sounds selfish maybe, but I can't exactly be of use to anyone if I'm in a high stress/depression state 24/7 reacting to each and every one of their remarks and letting it bother me for days or months either

>>65906
To add, I think what lead to this is me "drilling" it into my head that you only have so much time left alive on this earth and that it's a currency worth more than money or gold
I'll be borrowing an analogy from someone else, but imagine your lifespan in the case of a rifle's magazine holding 30 rounds each, 1 mag = 1 month, if you're a 20 something, you have about 750 mags left, if you're 30 you have about 600
Waste a day with no clear goal and that's one "bullet" spent, one day closer to grave with nothing to show for it if one continues on like this 
Or if you prefer, you can count how many summers or winters you have left to enjoy corresponding to the average lifespan, sounds a bit dreary, but for me it does help prioritize things that are important to me first and to get out of bed and do something before I rot away and die